Ambrosio's BDSM Site >> Dating & Communication >> BDSM Play Partner Check List    
Ambrosio's Newsletter


Courtesy of Yahoo! Groups
Ambrosio's BDSM Site (link to Homepage with Sitemap)
Search This Site


Courtesy of FreeFind

BDSM Play Partner Check List

Older (Static) Version

This is a copy of a checklist I found on a usenet newsgroup in in the mid 90s. It's been reposted on numerous other Internet sites including http://www.sexuality.org/l/bdsm/checklst.txt, the Crave Web Site, the discontinued Castle Realm web site, the discontinued ^cat^'s House and Dungeon web site, and the discontinued D/s Kiosk web site.

The original checklist has been attributed to "JillM" but it has been further expanded by the late Tammad Rimilia with contributions by Mistress Kim, Iron Rose, Lee, and others. Tammad had given me permission to "deep link" to his most recent revision but his web site is no longer on-line.

This version of the checklist remains largely the same as I found it --- how it was after Tammad Rimilia updated it in the mid 90's. I haven't changed the formatting or the content of the list or added the dynamic prgramming like I have elsewhere. For the revise, dynamic versions of the list, follow these links:

Another variation is available in Word 6 format for your easy modifications and printing convenience.

Ambrosio

 

This questionaire should be filled out by a Sub and provided to their Dom/Top before playing with them. This will provide a quick "head-start" to identifying limits, negotiating and finding common ground for play.

For each item, you need to provide two answers: Select one answer for the Experience column.

Then select another another answer from the Willingness column to rate how you FEEL about that activity and how willing you are to do it.

NOmeans you will NOT do that item under any circumstances (a hard limit).
0 (zero)indicates you have utterly no desire to do that activity and don't like doing it (in fact, may loath it) and would ordinarily object to doing it, but you would be willing to do it to please the Dominant if it they really wanted it. (sometimes called a "soft limit").
1means you don't want to do or like to do this activity, but wouldn't object if it was asked of you.
2means you are willing to do this activity, but it has no special appeal for you.
3means you usually like doing this activity, at least on an irregular/ occasional basis.
4means you like doing this activity, and would like to experience it on a regular basis.
5means the activity is a wild turn-on for you, and you would like it as often as possible.
*Mark with an asterisk (*) those items which you are willing to do only with you current sex partner(s), but not with casual play-partners.

Note any additional information which might be important for your Dom to know.

There is intentionally some overlap between categories. Unless otherwise stated, the Sub is the recipient of the activity.

ActivitiesExperience: yes/no,Willingness
Abrasion Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Age play Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Anal sex Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Anal plugs (small) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Anal plugs (large) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Anal plug (public, under clothes) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Animal roles Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Arm & leg sleeves (armbinders) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Asphyxiation Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Auctioned for charity Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Bathroom use control Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Beastiality Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Beating (soft) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Beating (hard) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Blindfolds Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Being serviced (sexual) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Being bitten Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Breast/chest bondage Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Breath control Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Branding Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Boot worship Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Bondage (light) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Bondage (heavy) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Bondage (multi-day) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Bondage (public, under clothing) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Breast whipping Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Brown showers (scat) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Cages (locked inside of) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Caning Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Catheterization Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Cells/Closets (locked inside of) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Chastity belts Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Chaueffering Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Choking Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Clothespins Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Cock worship Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Collars (worn in private) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Collars (worn in public) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Competitions (with other Subs) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Corsets (wearing) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Cuffs (leather) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Cuffs (metal) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Cutting Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Dilation Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Double penetration Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Electricity Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Enemas Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Enforced chastity Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Examinations (physical) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Exercise (forced/required) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Exhibitionism (friends) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Exhibitionism (strangers) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Eye contact restrictions Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Face slapping Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Fantasy abandonment Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Fantasy rape Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Fantasy gang-rape Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Fisting (anal) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Fisting (vaginal) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Following orders Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Foot worship Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Forced dressing Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Forced homosexuality Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Forced masturbation Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Forced nudity (private) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Forced nudity (around others) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Forced servitude Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Full head hoods Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Gags (cloth) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Gags (rubber) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Gags (tape) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Gates of Hell (male) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Genital sex Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Given away to another Dom (temp) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Given away to another Dom (perm) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Golden showers Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Hairbrush spankings Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Hair pulling Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Hand jobs (giving) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Hand jobs (receiving) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Harems (serving w/other subs) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Harnessing (leather) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Harnessing (rope) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Having food chosen for you Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Having clothing chosen for you Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Head (giving fellatio) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Head (receiving fellatio) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
High heel worship Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Homage with toungue (non-sexual) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Hot oils (on genitals) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Hot waxing Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Housework (doing) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Human puppy dog Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Humiliation (private) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Humiliation (public) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Hypnotism Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Ice cubes Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Infantalism Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Initiation rites Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Injections Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Intricate (Japanese) rope bondage Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Interrogations Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Kidnapping Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Kneeling Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Leather clothing Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Leather restraints Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Lectures for misbehavior Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Licking (non-sexual) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Manacles & Irons Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Manacures (giving) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Massage (giving) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Massage (receiving) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Medical scenes Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Modeling for erotic photos Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Mouth bits Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Mummification Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Nipple clamps Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Nipple weights Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Oral/anal play (rimming) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Over-the-knee spanking Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Orgasm denial Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Orgasm control Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Outdoor scenes Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Outdoor sex Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Phone sex (serving Dom) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Phone sex (serving Dom's friends) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Piercing (temporary, play-pierce) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Piercing (permanant) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Prison scenes Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Pony slave Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Public exposure Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Pussy/cock whipping Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Pussy worship Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Riding crops Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Riding the 'horse' (crotch torture) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Rituals Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Religious scenes Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Restrictive rules on behavior Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Rubber/latex clothing Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Rope body harness Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Saran wrapping Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Scratching - getting Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Scratching - giving Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Sensory deprivation Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Serving Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Serving as art Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Serving as ashtray Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Serving as furniture Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Serving as a maid Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Serving as toilet Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Serving as waitress/waiter Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Serving orally (sexual) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Serving other doms (supervised) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Serving other doms (unsupervised) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Sexual deprivation (short term) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Sexual deprivation (long term) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Shaving (body hair) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Shaving (head hair) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Sleep deprivation Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Sleepsacks Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Slutty clothing (private) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Slutty clothing (public) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Spanking Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Spandex clothing Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Speech restrictions (when, what) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Speculums (Anal) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Speculums (vaginal) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Spreader bars Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Standing in corner Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Stocks Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Straight jackets Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Strap-on-dildos (sucking on) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Strap-on-dildos (penetrated by) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Strap-on-dildos (wearing) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Strapping (full body beating) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Suspension (upright) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Suspension (inverted) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Suspension (horizontal) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Supplying new partners for Dom Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Swallowing semen Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Swallowing urine Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Swapping (with one other couple) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Swinging (multiple couples) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Tattooing Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Teasing Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Tickling Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Triple penetration Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Uniforms Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Including others Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Vaginal dildo Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Verbal humiliation Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Vibrator on genitals Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Voyeurism (watching others) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Voyeurism (your Dom w/others) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Video (watching others) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Video (recordings of you) Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Water torture Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Wearing symbolic jewelery Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Whipping Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Wooden paddles Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Wrestling Yes / No No 0 1 2 3 4 5
Willingness quick-key:
? Don't understand this item.
* I will do with current sex partner only.
NO I WILL NOT DO that item under ANY circumstances (a hard limit).
0 No desire, don't like, will permit if special to Dom (a soft limit).
1 Don't want to do, but will.
2 Willing to do, but has no special appeal.
3 Usually LIKE doing, on an irregular/ occasional basis.
4 LIKE doing, would like it on a regular basis.
5 WILD TURN-ON, would like it as often as possible.

More on Negotiation Forms, Checklists, and Contracts

 

Send a friend this webpage
Back to Top